jump to navigation

Lindsay Lohan Digital Breast Reduction June 21, 2005

“Teen actress Lindsay Lohan has had her breasts reduced digitally, at least, in her new movie Herbie: Fully Loaded. Disney bosses ordered her assets be slimmed down by two cup sizes over fears Lindsay’s character, Maggie Peyton, was too raunchy for a family film, according to IMDB. The orders came after Disney received several complaints from parents at test screenings. A team of experts airbrushed every scene from new movie Herbie: Fully Loaded and dramatically reduce her boob size. Revealing necklines were also raised. Artists were told to pay extra special attention to scenes which showed the sexy star jumping up and down… Clearly bemused by the whole thing, Lindsay Lohan said: ‘I don’t know how Renee Zellweger kept swelling and shrinking for Bridget Jones.’” —Fashion Monitor (Canada)

No doubt the public fascination with Lindsay Lohan has much to do with the fact that the really cute little girl in the Parent Trap sprouted an enormous set of breasts. If she had seemed like an intelligent little girl in the movie — craftily managing two characters and a fake British accent — her bodacious boobs now seem to have deprived her of any but the most visceral and lewd fascination. She didn’t grow up in the public eye to be smart or shrewd, like Jodie Foster. Instead she’s just fodder for tabloids and connoisseurs of celebrity nipple slips. (Certainly the Lindsay Lohan Boob Squeeze Video is the best of these.)

If anything, the digital breast reduction that Disney has performed on Ms. Lohan’s character only reinforces the point. Isn’t Disney trying to turn back the clock on her, reverse puberty, recover the cute little girl who seems to have been hidden beneath a costume of big boobs? Maybe for her next movie Disney will just dispense with the real Ms. Lohan and use special effects to recreate the adolescent version of her, which clearly they’d prefer. And meanwhile the real Ms. Lohan can follow the dismal career path of so many other child stars — though at least she’ll never have to resort to working in gas stations, since with boobs like hers she could always turn to porn. And isn’t that what everyone would really like her to do anyway? Screw Disney. Let’s see her on Ass Traffic.


Original Article syndicated via RSS from PervScan

Comments

Sorry comments are closed for this entry