Eat Angie, Eat! February 21, 2006
empty calories! 
they think they can escape the paparazzi?
Angelina as a child
see the guy holding Angie’s purse? I want one of those
Angelina Jolie has been told by her dcotors to chow down and put some weight on her skinny bones. Angie, as I call her, should be gaining weight in anticipation of the World’s Most Beautiful Baby, instead she is starving herself. She needs to take a page out of Britney Spear’s pre-natal guide and make herself some mayonaisse sandwiches and deep fry a couple of Twinkies. Secretly, I think Brad likes his women skinny. Brad encourages his girlfriends/wives to stay super- skinny and in return he will dye his hair to match theirs. It’s true. For that alone I could never be involved with Brad. I like to eat!
Angie has gained twelve pounds thus far and is risking her baby’s health if she doesn’t start eating more. She’s in france! Croissants and fine baked goods, breads and chocolates abound, what’s the problem? I would probably tip the scales at over 200 lbs if I were to move to France. Oh wait, French Women Don’t Get Fat!
Brad and Angie are setting up house in France just like Johnny Depp. They are doing this in hopes that the paparazzi will leave them alone and they can be a private, normal family… normal Forget it!
The relocation makes it very difficult for Aunt Jennifer and Uncle Vince to come visit and babysit the infant who is rumored to be a boy and be called either William or Marlow. Plus, I don’t ship gifts internationally so they can forget about a pair of mini distressed jeans from Auntie DJ.
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